Shall We Start With An Aphrodisiac?
written by a woman who happens to think “sexy” is ALWAYS a good idea.
noun: aphrodisiac; plural noun: aphrodisiacs; adjective: aphrodisiac
1. a food, drink, or drug that stimulates sexual desire.
2. a thing that causes excitement.
SEX and APHRODISIACS. Named after the powerful goddess, Aphrodite, the word “aphrodisiac” alone makes you perk up. In Greek mythology, Aphrodite is the goddess of love, beauty and sexual rapture. Yes. Rapture as in primal, devour-worthy flesh indulgent rapture. Now combine that with this impending influx of passion, love, and expectation and what you have is a recipe for something divinely sexy (if you take the consumerism out of it). Sure, you can wait until VDay – OR – you can start getting in the mood to have a little sensual foreplay straight away! A daily countdown if you will.
This article is dedicated to the different ways to bring a little sexy back into your love life – but the difference is, let’s make it about thoughtful provocation rather than feeding the beast that lends to the buildup of one single day. Be sexy and surprising every chance you get because honestly, a well fed lover is a happy human being. We could all stand a little more happy …
5 aphrodisiacs found in nature from the bottom of the list to the top (just the way you like it):
Cardamom is deemed a powerful aphrodisiac, as well as a cure for impotence (Um, look fellas, go natural whenever you can). Have a little youthful fun too. Go ahead. Say cardamom a few times, ya know, like that scene in “Elf” where Will Farrell – aka “Buddy the Elf” says the name “Francisco”? Cardamom is kind of fun to say. It just rolls off of the tongue with whimsy. The spice added to a little something like, say, blackberries and a little citrus and it might just surprise you. Try it.
It is high in cineole, which can increase blood flow in areas where it is applied.
Ok, have you ever really looked at an oyster? Let’s be honest, the appeal of it visually alone is a start. Throw in the way you have to place that salty bed onto the edge of your mouth to allow your tongue to grasp on and pull it in as it glides down and well, um … ok, let’s get back to the scientific characteristics make this one an aphrodisiac. (Yes, it’s ok, you can take a second. Those of you who have had oysters know this is definitely a very worthy candidate)
Oysters are high in zinc and have a reputation for being great for love and fertility. Researchers recently found that oysters contain amino acids that trigger production of sex hormones.
3. CHILI PEPPER
No, not thee Red Hot Chili Peppers (though for some this is up for debate!) We mean those spicy infernos that kick up our blood flow and wake up our sinuses. Chilis in general are more than just fiery flames of tasty goodness. In fact, they can make a cocktail downright sensual when done right. There are even harbanero tequilas! Pour some of that with fresh lime, a little homemade sweet n sour, a tinge of sugar cayenne rim with some muddled mint and what you have is one utterly sexy drink. But that’s another article … (don’t worry, it’s coming.)
As it turns out, “chili peppers stimulate endorphins, speed up heart rate and make you sweat, which all mimic how you feel when you’re aroused”, Dr. Meryl S. Rosofsky told the New York Times. (Thank you doc!)
The mere thought of honey dripping is indulgent and intriguing.
That said, using honey as foreplay can be downright seductive and messy in all the right ways. Instead of the obvious, try just dabbing a few droplets on the nape of your lover’s neck and then taking your time cleaning it up. The neck holds the key to a plethora of erogenous sensations.
1. DARK CHOCOLATE
This seems like an easy one but not for the obvious reasons. Have you ever REALLY experienced chocolate? Spend the money on a truly good 80+ % full dark cocoa bar. Unwrap that bar ever so carefully allowing the aroma to dance under your nose. Take out those fingers and break off a quarter-sized edge. Place it in between your middle finger and thumb and very slowly rub it together until you feel the warmth begin to take hold and the chocolate begins to playfully melt. At that moment place that piece of melted sensuality and place it at the roof of your mouth. Press your tongue against it and allow the flavors to drip out. After you feel every part of it, only then can you allow your mouth to follow suit and devour it.
See? Now THAT is sexy.
Now Are You Feeling A Little Frisky?
5 Reasons to approach sensuality over raw sex. Using all 5 senses.
Touch is by far the most underutilized sense. Dragging fingertips slowly over a bare back sends chills over your entire body. Take those well groomed hands and touch your partner’s entire, yes, ENTIRE, body but find yourself spending extra care to the inner thighs, the stomach, the neck, the hands, that little open crevice between the wrist and the interior of the forearm … do this for a good thirty minutes and I can promise your partner won’t be the only one aroused.
Yes. Sound. Begin with #5 and listen as the sounds of sheer lust escape in breaths, sighs, moans. This one is self explanatory but when you hit those extra sensitive zones that cause an additional reach for your hand or a gesture of encouragement, well, you – are – there and your partner is undoubtedly – and happily – hungry … for YOU. Throw on some sultry music and your stage is set.
Have you really looked at the person you are about to devour? Their expressions? Have you taken the time to pay attention to the curve of their back, the shape of their mouth, the way their eyes become far more endearing when you make them feel desired? Well, now is as good a time as any. Body language is also an indicator of what works and what doesn’t. Paying attention to the way his or her body moves will be like a road map to their form of ecstasy and in the end make you the one they can’t live without.
Ever heard the saying, “… smells like sex”? Trust me, it’s real. Actual pheromones are released when you are in that state of physical intoxication. When your partner is feeling the passion, you can physically smell it and once you do, it will be like a drug you have always longed for and have to have more of. (This is another flawless fail-proof way to know when your partner is happy and aroused versus “pretending”.)
Mouths are by far the most intriguing part of our entire physical being. The Kiss. This seems almost strange to have to suggest that kissing matters and to have to stree that it isn’t done enough. A single kiss can be thee most euphoric way of connecting with someone. It is intimate and when done right, well, it can take you to places you only imagined. The warmth of relaxed, but intent lips sweetly kissing yours (not lizard kissing) – I’m talking passion: Soft and lovely – it can tell you EVERYTHING. Someone who can kiss well, well, let’s just say that isn’t all they’ll be able to do. It’s a little known fact that a single kiss can render one defenseless. “The kiss that stole her heart”; “the kiss that made time stand still”; “The kiss that caused fireworks”. These aren’t all dramatic descriptors. A kiss is the thing that measures whether or not there is chemistry. Male or female … if you have an ounce of passion or sensual hunger, a kiss can mean everything. People who don’t kiss are actually emotionally incapable of opening themselves up. It’s a scientific fact:
“After that first kiss, these types are much more likely than other subjects to change their minds about a potential partner, researchers found. If it’s not in his kiss, forget about him.” – NY Times
Not to put on the pressure but kisses not only envelop ones sexuality, it awakens a deeper curiosity and suddenly those other 4 senses are far more likely to find a place to play.
Enjoy a little exploration …
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This article has been inspired by oh so many things. Thanks to Vosges Haut Chocolat for keeping us on our toes: